April 29, 2004
Toil
Have you ever had one of those years that just sort of sucks the life out of you? That’s how this one appears to be shaping up. Existence is going from one activity to the next with little time to really appreciate this gift of life. I remarked to my small group from church last Tuesday that the demarcation points for each day are the same old events. It’s getting old, and it’s making me weary.
Circumstances at work have nudged me in the direction of project management. I realize the need behind management’s insistence that I take on this role – I probably am the best person for this job, but I don’t have to like it. I’ve done it before and have concluded that it’s a thankless job. Not that I have any problems with the team; they’re a great group of people. I guess that I’ve always seen myself as a nurturer, someone who worked behind the scenes to keep everything together. I definitely don’t like being out front waving the flag!
I hate coming home exhausted but feeling that I need to do more – at least catch up on the things that I wanted to accomplish at work but didn’t get a chance to because of interruptions. I hate having very little time to myself to write; it had become a welcome activity that I looked forward to. I guess that we do what we can to survive and hope that we do a good enough job.
One of my team mates is leaving for Spain tomorrow. I wish I were going with her – I could use the rest and relaxation! But June will be here soon enough and before I know it I’ll be walking around those Mayan pyramids, snorkeling in that clear Gulf water, or just enjoying myself on the deck of the ship. Until that time though, all I foresee is project schedules, capacity estimates and program design with little time left over for musing out here in cyberspace. Still, it beats the hell out of unemployment!
